Sitting down and talking with your partner about seeing a couples counseling therapist takes a lot of guts. Despite the fact that some people think it’s a sign that your relationship is falling apart, the truth of the matter is that when you’re able to admit you and your partner need to see someone you’re actually being incredibly brave and proactive. You’re admitting to yourself that you’re not as happy as you’d like to be, but that you want to stay with the person you’re with and you’ll do whatever it takes to make that happen. It takes a great deal of courage to tell your partner that you want to see someone, and even more to actually go through with it.
There are lots of great couples therapists out there, but finding one that’s right for you and your partner can be difficult. Every relationship is unique. Thus, you’ll want to find a couples therapist who knows this and who will work well with you and your partner. Maybe you only want to meet with a woman, or maybe you and your partner would prefer a man. These are the kinds of things you should be considering when you’re looking for a couples therapist. If you’re not really sure what to keep your eye out for, here are five things that you should be looking for. Stick to this list and you’ll have a positive experience with couples therapy.
1. Comfort. First, you should be looking for a couples therapist who you feel comfortable working with. You’re going to be divulging the deepest secrets and issues you’re having in your relationship, and this is only going to be possible if you feel comfortable enough with the person to do so. Talk with them over the phone or meet them in person before moving forward with your counseling sessions. If nothing else, use the first session as a gauge for how comfortable you and your partner feel.
2. Engaging. There is nothing worse than laying out the issues you’re having in your relationship only to be talking to someone who isn’t all that engaged. Make sure your therapist actually wants to be there, that they’re engaged and interested in what you have to say.
3. Earnest. In addition to engaging, you want to make sure that your couples therapist is earnest. This means that they are fully committed to helping you and your partner work out your issues.
4. Open. Fourth, look for a therapist who is going to be open with you about the kinds of issues you and your partner are facing and what you both can do to help resolve them.
5. Honest. Lastly, you’ll want to make sure they’re honest. If they believe you need further help or if they think your issues are pretty serious, you’re going to want them to tell you that. Make sure they can be honest about what they’re seeing and hearing.
Mercier Wellness & Consulting is a great place where you can likely find all of the things outlined above. Of course, each relationship is unique, so you’ll want to talk with them before moving forward with a definitive plan.